Heebie Jeebies

I promised a story, so I'll tell one of the first ones there is to tell when we arrived in Bulembu and to our lovely home. It was the first night we were staying in Hyde Park 3 and we were each getting settled before going to bed. It had been a warm day so all of the windows in Chelsea, Ashleigh, and my room were open. My bed was closest to the window and I was just tidying up and talking to my roommates when Chelsea just points up at the ceiling. I saw a black thing on the ceiling when we had gotten back from dinner, but I wrote it off as a crack or blemish on the white. Funny part is...it was right above my bed. Chelsea just looks up and says that looks like a spider. It was long and didn't look like a spider at all, but when you looked closer, it was just spread out. Spread out it was probably 5+ inches long. So pretty much it was the biggest spider any of us had seen!!! Genius Matt comes in and decides to throw his hat at it which made it drop to the ground and start moving. Thankfully, Chelsea was prepared with a pan and lid and after much yelling from Sam to "put the lid on it!" it was finally captured under the lid. They finagled it into the large part of the pan and Matt ran outside with the top on and through it into the bushes. We do have a video of this and I'll try and find it and put it on facebook. It was quite the sight to see!
To say this was an exciting part of the trip is an understatement. I would open my eyes at random times through the first few nights and expect it to be lowering itself onto my face. I definitely had the heebie jeebies for a while. It was the biggest bug we saw while we were there except for the giant grasshoppers which were everywhere and were poisonous to eat. I've attached a picture of one of those.
One thing that has been interesting to readjust to are the mosquitoes! I don't think I saw one while I was in Africa and I already have a bite since being back.
It's weird but I miss the grasshoppers. It's just one part of the country that I've fallen in love with!

Forgetting...

A week ago today our team was leaving the amazing town and people of Bulembu. We drove through the town for the last time as we headed to the Safari. I couldn't help but tear up because even then I was afraid of forgetting. As a Psych major I know the unreliability of memories. From this point of view I'm terrified of forgetting. This morning was the first morning I didn't wake up thinking that I was halfway around the world and I can't decide if it's a good thing or a bad thing yet. I'm starting to feel more at home here, but I don't want that to mean that I feel less at home in Bulembu. Sometimes I feel like this is dragging out longer than it should be but I honestly can't help it. I'm so worried about forgetting that I do everything I can do to keep thinking about it and the details of the trip. I don't want to forget the smell of Siboniso's head or the radiance of Timmy's smile or Hlobile's beautiful voice. I feel as though they're slipping away and there's nothing I can do about that. Memories dull with time. I never want to forget any detail but I'm learning to accept the fact that I will. Pictures are a beautiful invention and I thank God for them to be a constant reminder of my amazing time in Bulembu. What I mainly don't want to forget is the amazing way that I felt God while I was there. I can already feel myself becoming more apathetic since being back and I'm slipping on my daily time with Him. But I know it so I'm going to change it.
I think I'm going to start doing my alone time with God in the morning because I have been getting up between 530-630 every morning so that means I have time now. I just want to use my time to feel close to God and feel His embrace when I need it the most.

This was a more pensive post...more stories to come in the following posts.

Akabongwe somandla

Today marks the third day that I have been back in the United States. It marks the third day of realizing that I'm thousands of miles away from the children and people who have completely stolen my heart. Don't get me wrong - it's nice to be home and to feel "normal", but at times I feel absolutely lost. Walking into a grocery store gave me anxiety...weird right? I've had the constant urge to cry whenever I think about how much I miss those kids and I'm not a crier. This sounds like a very negative post, but it's not meant to be. It's meant to be the tip of the iceberg of what God did in my life in the last month. I allowed the kids and people of Bulembu into my heart which can sometimes be like Fort Knox. The amazing thing is I allowed them in without a shred of fight in me. I longed for them to be let in and to influence my life in all different ways. Each person in that town has forever affected how I live my life and how I will live my life in the future.
We were each assigned a house to be in for the duration of our time in Bulembu. Alicia and I were assigned to house 6. We didn't know what that meant or why God had put us together or with those kids, but we knew that we were there for a reason and that God had a plan for us. Well, God's plan was a fantastic one! The Auntie or Mom of the house was one of the most incredible Christian women I have ever meant. I heard her life story and through that felt her heart beating for Christ and for the kids that He has placed in her life. She has 8 kids in her house ranging in age from 6 years old to 17 years old. Each of them is completely unique and wonderful. Once the kids turn 18 they are moved to senior boys and girls houses to learn more about being an adult and providing for themselves. Kids are not brought into the actual houses until age 4. Before then, they are in baby houses and toddler houses. The system that they are using seems to be very effective and benefits the kids.
My favorite experience in the house happened the one night we all stayed for dinner in our houses. Alicia and I weren't sure how it was going to go and neither of us knew what the customs or traditions around dinner were in Swazi culture. Dinner was quiet for the first few minutes and I didn't know if it was just us or if it was the culture, so I just started to ask questions at different kids around the table. After awhile the conversations flowed and I found out so much more about the house and the family residing inside. After our dinner of bean soup, pap, and cole slaw, we moved a few feet to the living room. The oldest boy had an energy test the next day so he was studying by the fire. The rest of us were taking a few pictures and just hanging out. The oldest girl pulled me aside and showed me a notebook she had going with English praise songs inside that she had learned from church. Songs such as Mighty to Save among others. She asked if I wanted to sing them with her and one of her sisters. Just a quick side note, one thing I really learned on this trip was that God gave us a voice for a reason, whether we can sing or not. I can be shy about singing around people, especially if I know they're listening, but it didn't seem to matter there. I was singing with them and that helped to bond us. Anyway, back to the story, so the older girls and I started to sing songs - lots of songs! Soon, the kids joined in. While we were singing a song, I noticed the older boy was tapping his foot and humming along. I called his name and told him that he should come sing for a few minutes. He didn't even hesitate. He plays in the band at church, so most of the songs were extremely familiar to him. I remember sitting there and listening to their voices and all I could say was praise God for each of these people and for His plan for their lives. This "family" was beautiful and not normal by "normal" standards. They were God's type of family. A family with Him at the center and love all around. Alicia and I were wholeheartedly accepted into this family and I am forever grateful. When one of the boys was writing a list of his family in my journal, Alicia and I were on that list.
It's still hard for me to think of them without crying, but it isn't a bad cry or a sorrowful cry. It's a cry of love and thankfulness for getting the amazing opportunity to fall head over heels in love with these people.
I don't know if I said my last goodbyes to my Swazi family, but I feel as though God is done with me yet. I feel like He has so much more to teach me through my time in Bulembu and maybe more through going back. I don't know, but He does and that is sufficient for me.


"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future. Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart. I will be found by you, says the Lord..."
Jeremiah 29:11-14


Thank you, God, for being a God who listens, plans, and is found by us. Help us to seek you daily with our WHOLE heart and not just what we can afford that day. <3